Lost Without You
by aechfic
Summary: Each of them is a crucial, integral part of the crew- a family so close-knit that to lose any one member would devastate them all... Mugiwara nakama-ship; spoilers up to and including current events.
1. Introduction

Despite the generally cheerful atmosphere of the Thousand Sunny and the normally high spirits of its unusual and rather eclectic crew, the Straw Hat pirates can't escape their pasts. Each of them brings to the ship a lifetime of memories both pleasant and unfortunate and, although many of them would prefer to think otherwise, he or she carries an inescapable barrage of personal emotional baggage that rises to the surface when least expected.

They move on - it's what they do best, and they cannot afford to hesitate, not with the World Government's steadily-increasing bounties on their heads or the constant perils of the Grand Line - but their fears and failures move right along with them. And while they try not to dwell on their shortcomings and their losses, human nature dictates otherwise and sometimes all it takes is a glance, a word, a gesture, for those deeply buried insecurities to come creeping back.


	2. Brook

He's morbidly aware that there's something not quite right with his head- beyond the obvious absence of any soft tissue or brain matter and the faint rattle of that precious tone dial whenever he turns too quickly. But it's to be expected, he supposes, after spending so many lonely years wandering vacant decks, gently wiping away the dust gathering on his nakama's grinning skulls and trying not to watch the flesh shriveling and receding from his own slender bones.

While his inability to sleep still means agonizingly long and sometimes dreary nights, especially if he's the only one on watch, at least he's no longer alone. Now he spends those hours watching his new crewmates toss and turn in their bunks or rise briefly to stumble off to the bathroom, and he no longer curses his empty sockets, because he's painfully aware just how quickly things can change in a moment, a second, the blink of an eye.

He's also guiltily glad that he doesn't dream.


	3. Franky

Despite his initial and quite adamant refusal to board the newly completed Thousand Sunny - which resulted in that extensive and somewhat humiliating chase through the streets of Water Seven in pursuit of his sea panties - he was greatly relieved when Luffy insisted that he join the crew. Because while the simple act of building the ship did indeed fulfill something of his dreams, he wasn't entirely truthful regarding the full extent of them. In reality, he wanted to go with them from the moment he asked them to sail the ship that had until now existed only on blueprint parchment, even before he took up his tools and the first plank of Adam wood.

He's always secretly contemplated his shipyard creations as his children, and seeing the fruits of his labor turned against him and used to rain down death and destruction on innocent people during his days as Tom's apprentice- well, it crushed something deep inside him that's only begun to bloom anew as he watches his new nakama explore the ship from bow to stern, chattering excitedly over each room and each new surprise as it's revealed.

After witnessing their tearful farewells to the Going Merry, he knew he'd be leaving his masterpiece in excellent hands even if he bid the Straw Hats farewell and left them to their own devices. They're determined and resilient people; he knows because he watched their actions quite closely during their assault on Enies Lobby to rescue Nico Robin- who's also proved herself a strong and resourceful woman. With an impressive grip.

But there are disturbing parallels that he can't help noticing: two ships built of Adam wood, two "D" pirate captains and two crews loyal unto death...

He considers the Oro Jackson's plight - captain executed, crew disbanded, the whereabouts of the vessel itself unknown - and it strengthens his resolve. He'll serve as shipwright, maintain the Thousand Sunny and do everything in his power to keep his sea-going child and her crew safe.

History will not repeat itself.


	4. Robin

Following the events that took place in Water Seven and Enies Lobby, the constricting bands of futility encircling her heart slowly begin to ease, but after so many years of avoiding- of being forced to outright flee human contact despite her desperate internal longing to find acceptance, she's sometimes overwhelmed by the sheer constant presence of her fellow Straw Hats as they go about their daily business.

She's not sure she's ever spent so long in the company of the same group of people, learning their quirks and bad habits and listening to their lofty dreams, and when she watches the more rambunctious of them strut and gallivant about the ship in a perpetual whirlwind of laughter and shouting and flailing limbs that somehow provokes heady, ridiculous grins from even the most sedate of crewmembers- she's torn between the urges to either join them in their frivolity or secret herself away in the relative quiet and emotional calm of the women's quarters.

On rare occasions, she joins the mayhem, but it never lasts long. So much noise, so many people eager to talk and touch and shower her with attention that it leaves her pulse fluttering in her throat like a startled hummingbird.

She settles for reclining on a lawn deck chair with an open book in hand, watching them from the corner of her eye, and although she's supposedly mastered the ability to cloak her emotions - lock them in a lead-lined box and throw away the key, as it were, which has saved her life more than once - she's not always aware of the small, shy smile curling the edges of her mouth.

It's more evident than ever: they've become her strength... but they're also her weakness.


End file.
